Blogger and Black Lives Matter activist Ariel BelongsintheSea has triumphantly declared an end to homophobia in America.
Hooray!
In a surprise post this weekend, Ms. BelongsintheSea took to her keyboard to remind her thousands of followers that the Supreme Court, in a landslide 5-4 decision, officially recognized same-sex couples’ constitutional right to marry.
The SCOTUS decision, declared 8 months ago, was leaked to Ms. BelongsintheSea by an undisclosed informant, making us here at B & S strike our heads as if we could’ve had a V8.
How could we have missed this scoop!
Ms. BelongsintheSea goes on to describe not only the support of us stinky gay folk by the entire heterosexual community, but, more importantly, the details of a bi-partisan Pride party to be hosted by none other than candidate for the Republican nomination for President, Ted Cruz.
“Republicans will wear strap-ons as hats, and Democrats will line the mahogany balustrade of Cruz’s Texas Estate chanting “Yas Queen” in Gregorian style.”
Yet, where there’s unanimity, there’s a word that kind of sounds like enmity.
Ms. BelongsintheSea signed off her blog post by enumerating a list of cultural appropriations waged against black Americans by newly-equal homosexuals.
The list includes the theft of “Yas Queen!” from possibly black drag queens, having sex with black men, and enjoying R&B.
So I ask to my newly first-class-citizen followers:
As a newly-equal gay American, how will you curb your own queer culture so as to better integrate into the amorphous blob of white straight Americans who beckon us forward to the coveted sovereignty of now-unchecked privilege?
Leave your answers in the comments section below!
The Boast and Spurrier 